Beyond the headline issue, there are usually tells that English cricket is in a bit of a pickle.
The huddle on Wednesday morning, for instance, was as big as it ever has been in Brendon McCullum's time as head coach, and that's even allowing for a few more support staff added since the winter.
The parents of Sonny Baker, Jordan Cox and James Rew, along with an assortment of other family and friends of the three Test debutants, bumped up the attendance. Likewise, the presence of Steven Finn and Nasser Hussain for cap presentations to Baker and Cox respectively. Assistant coach Marcus Trescothick, bona fide Somerset legend, doubled-up to present Rew with his.
Even the numbers on the back of the shirts told a story. England's Test creams have only embraced such things since 2019, but the rate of change with five alterations to the XI that beat New Zealand in the first Test, and the fact that only four numbers have been worn by multiple men in this format, meant Ben Duckett (17) and Jofra Archer (22) were the only two below 50 in this second Test.
Granted, that's probably not the best measure of disarray. After all, the elephant at The Kia Oval would have donned 55 on his back had he been allowed to. But Ben Stokes' absence and the reasons behind it have the ECB and its flagship team in the kind of flux that often acts as a magnet for further issues. Sure enough, with Gus Atkinson already missing as a consequence of that fracas in a Chelsea nightclub, the misfortune of Ollie Robinson's knee injury and the gift of a second child for Jamie Smith brought more unrest.
And yet, as this merry band walked off at 7pm, they did so to much appreciation from those that remained from a sell-out day-one crowd. The looming 9pm kick-off of England's football World Cup campaign had dragged some punters away, but even those absentees had left feeling appreciative of the efforts of a makeshift England team. New Zealand, for their part, may wonder how their 291 runs have come at the cost of seven wickets.
There were shades of the Pakistan ODI series in the summer of 2021. Back then, a Covid outbreak within the England white-ball camp had forced the original squad into isolation. A mayday call was put out for the next-gen. In they swaggered, thumping their more experienced opponents 3-0 with the kind of thrill and verve that brought a distinctly different vibe to an otherwise run-of-the-mill bilateral series.
The man who captained them with Eoin Morgan quarantined? A reluctant but duty-bound Stokes. At the time, and a year before he considered taking on the England Test captaincy, England's allrounder was recovering from a nasty finger injury sustained at the IPL. Now, with decisions to be made on how tenable his return to that captaincy might be, a new set of upstarts have begun to build their own stories in the shadow of Stokes' latest chapter.
Much like that ODI series five years ago, this had the feel of an Indie film. A production littered with side-street talents. Typical of the genre, not all will be here for the long haul.
Sonny Baker emerged as a crowd favourite, as McCullum had predicted. Truth be told, it was no great leap; anyone with the slightest taste for Test cricket has a place in their heart for a lion-hearted fast bowler who necks bone broth. And when they fist-pump the crowd after taking their maiden international wicket, following chastening ODI and T20I debuts last year, you're always likely to win them over.
Baker did not realise Joe Root was giving him the 12th over of the match, from the Vauxhall End, believing at the time he was simply being shifted in the field. Looking down in the first few steps of his run-up meant he was oblivious to movement behind him, resulting in a prolonged delay to deliver his first ball. When he eventually got going, he did not want to stop. Overnight figures of 2 for 63 from 15 overs have brought immense satisfaction and relief, after a wicketless first 11 overs of international cricket against South Africa (0 for 76) and Ireland (0 for 52).
"It was awesome - could you tell?" Baker beamed at stumps, feeling the love. "In T20s and stuff, where there's music on, you don't really sense the crowd quite as much. Whereas when it's silent and then there's just a trumpet in the background, yeah… you really feel the crowd getting behind you and that was awesome. I thought they took to me really nicely so I was very grateful for that, that's for sure."
His first wicket, Rachin Ravindra, who guided him to gully, came with a healthy assist from Josh Tongue, who had been locked in an engaging battle with New Zealand's No.4. A hearty ovation down at fine leg then led to plenty of checks over Baker's shoulder to remind himself this was all real.
His second wicket, to remove Daryl Mitchell, was a battle won on his own terms, particularly after the batter had blazed him over cover. That it broke a stand of 81 between Mitchell and Tom Blundell - the pair who scored the bulk of New Zealand's runs in 2022 - was a vital interjection.
As Mitchell alluded to in his end-of-day press conference, he was his own worst enemy; trapped between deciding to whether to keep the ball on the floor or take the aerial route. He was certainly not New Zealand's worst offender on the day.
All bar Henry Nicholls - who was undone by extra bounce from Tongue - contributed to their own downfall. And in doing so, the tourists let an attack who had never lined up together grow as one.
There were good balls in between the bad dismissals, though it is worth noting that 37 per cent of the 72 overs bowled by the seamers were either directed down the leg side or wide of off stump. The latter brought Matthew Fisher his second Test wicket, four years after he removed West Indies opener John Campbell for his only previous success, at Bridgetown on March 17, 2022. It was also Rew's first dismissal as a Test keeper.
Archer's first wicket since the third Ashes Test came from an over-ambitious flick to the leg side from New Zealand captain Tom Latham. Bethell, who completed that dismissal with a stunning Superman catch to his right at gully, was then the beneficiary of two gifts; Blundell failing to clear Root at midwicket with a slog sweep and Nathan Smith top-edging a full toss around the corner for Cox's first catch at this level. The Essex bater had spilled a difficult chance at leg slip off Mitchell, on two at the time.
Even Root, having opted to bowl first on what looked a good batting deck, was even able to indulge his players with the sort of funky captaincy that he had rarely dabbled in prior to dumping the job four years ago. There were leg gullies, leg slips - two at one point - and even three overs of Harry Brook's 60mph sweatband swingers. His punt to bring Bethell on paid dividends after three balls of short filth.
Root would have also relished the joy and the toil of a day like this, from new faces and old. The Test remains evenly poised, with further graft to come. On and off the field, there are more awkward days to come. But this one has gone as well as could be expected.